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Leadership often gets glamorized. From the outside, it looks like bigger paychecks, corner offices, and the freedom to make decisions. But those external markers don’t separate the best leaders from the rest.
What really distinguishes the best is their willingness to lead through sacrifice, service, and responsibility—the very things average leaders tend to avoid. When leaders chase perks instead of burdens, organizations slide into unhealthy patterns: cultures that coddle instead of challenge, values that blur into vagueness, and employees unprepared for the real demands of work.
That’s where Patrick Lencioni, CEO of The Table Group and bestselling author, comes in. In our latest conversation, he breaks down why leadership isn’t for everyone and why the best leaders embrace accountability and discomfort while the rest chase privilege.
We touch on some of the most pressing leadership challenges facing organizations today, from culture, resilience, and psychological safety, to the balance between inclusion and responsibility.
Listen to the episode here on Apple Podcast & leave a review!
The Real Test of Leadership
It’s a simple but uncomfortable truth: leadership is supposed to be hard, and if you’re not willing to carry that burden, you probably shouldn’t be leading.
For Patrick, the dividing line is clear: leadership must be rooted in service, not privilege. The best leaders sacrifice more than their teams, not less. They recognize that leadership is not a reward but a responsibility. By contrast, leaders who see leadership as entitlement often find themselves detached from the realities their teams face.
That doesn’t mean the best leaders burn out or act like martyrs. Instead, they carry the burden of accountability so their people can focus on doing great work. The rest, meanwhile, gravitate toward comfort and perks, leaving their teams without direction or resilience.
Culture Requires Clarity
Culture is another area where the best leaders stand apart. They are brutally clear about what their organization stands for and refuse to compromise on non-negotiables. The rest try to be “everything to everyone,” and in doing so, stand for nothing.
Patrick’s well-known framework of hiring people who are humble, hungry, and smart illustrates this difference. The best leaders don’t rely on policies or perks to hold culture together. They focus on hiring people with the right mindset and character. With the right people in place, the culture sustains itself. The rest attempt to patch weak hiring with endless guidelines, which only creates bureaucracy.
The Misuse of Psychological Safety
Psychological safety is another test. Many organizations have misunderstood it, and the difference between the best and the rest is in how they apply it.
Average leaders misuse psychological safety to avoid discomfort. They assume it means every idea must be welcomed unchallenged or that no one should feel uneasy. But the best leaders return to its original intent: ensuring employees can speak up without fear of ridicule, while still being held accountable.
Patrick and I agreed that discomfort isn’t the enemy; it’s the foundation of growth. The best leaders create environments where concerns and ideas can be voiced freely but not shielded from scrutiny. The rest dilute psychological safety into a comfort blanket that stifles performance.
Listen to the episode here on Apple Podcast & leave a review!
Resilience Over Rescue
Resilience is one of the most underrated traits that separates the best leaders from the rest.
The best leaders know resilience develops by facing challenges, not by being protected from them. They equip their people to handle pressure and setbacks. The rest, in the name of care, rescue their teams from every discomfort. But that only weakens their capacity to persevere over time.
This difference shows up in practices. Some organizations offer unlimited “stress days” or avoid tough conversations, believing they’re supporting employees. In reality, these practices often erode trust because they signal a lack of confidence in people’s ability to handle reality. The best leaders balance care with challenge, building strength instead of fragility.
How Leaders Can Apply These Lessons
What does this mean in practice? Here’s where the best leaders consistently set themselves apart:
- Clarity over confusion: Instead of piling on policies, they focus on clearly defining the two or three values that guide everything.
- Character over credentials: They hire for humility, hunger, and people smarts before technical skill, knowing culture is sustained by people, not rules.
- Empathy with accountability: They show care but never at the expense of performance, keeping standards clear and firm.
- Resilience over rescue: They prepare their people for real challenges rather than shielding them from every difficulty.
These are concrete habits that define whether leaders join the ranks of the best or stay in the middle of the pack.
Final Thoughts
The difference between the best leaders and the rest isn’t about titles, charisma, or perks. It’s about what they’re willing to sacrifice. The best lead with service, clarity, accountability, and resilience. The rest cling to privilege, comfort, and ambiguity, and in doing so, weaken their organizations.
Patrick Lencioni’s perspective is a timely reminder that leadership isn’t for everyone, and that’s the point. It demands clarity, sacrifice, and the courage to embrace discomfort. Those willing to pay that price separate themselves from the rest.
If you’re ready to explore these ideas more deeply and challenge how you think about culture, inclusion, and resilience, listen to the full episode of Future Ready Leadership with Patrick Lencioni.
Listen to the episode here on Apple Podcast & leave a review!